Holiday Meals Without the Stress: Modified Diets and Picky Eaters

Cheese balls. Cranberry sauce. Eating an enormous meal at a non-meal time of the day. Sitting and chatting with people who you haven’t seen since last year. What do all of these things have in common? Holiday Meals.

Here at SaSSKC, we are preparing our clients for holiday meals. We are teaching ways to reduce stress, feel confident, and focus on safety and participation. From our very youngest picky eaters to clients on modified diets, and even those who do not eat orally, we are setting the table, pun intended, to ensure that holiday meals and gatherings are centered on connection and celebration, not on what or how you eat. Here are some tips to make Holiday meals less stressful.

• The Holidays are not the time to introduce or carry over therapy strategies.

  • Do not expect your loved one to try new or challenging foods.

  • Any new or relatively new concepts should be avoided.

• Before the meal: Plan for success 

  • Find out what foods will likely be served at the gathering. Discuss the menu with your child or loved one. 

  • Offer to contribute to the meal by preparing at least one preferred or safe (both emotionally and physically) food for the menu. 

  • For children, consider timing: avoid arriving overly hungry, tired, or dysregulated. Discuss what the meal might look, sound, and smell like. 

  • For older adults, consider fatigue, medications, positioning, and the length of the meal.

• At the table: Make participation an option 

  • Let the person sit with everyone else whenever possible or desired. 

  • Provide choices rather than demands. •Keep portions manageable. 

  • Bring preferred or necessary tableware and dishes. 

  • Remember that being at the table is participation, even if someone eats very little.

• Recruit allies: Who wants to join Team Safe Eating? 

  • Discuss concerns and needs with other adults who will be present. 

  • Allow them to make plates and run interference if/when questions start to fly about eating differences. 

  • Practice self-advocating with your loved one so they can express their needs to others.

• Reflect 

  • After the meal, reflect on what went well and what you might like to change in the future. 

  • Offer specific praise to your child so they, too, can feel accomplished about their participation. 

Remember: we here at SaSSKC want everyone to enjoy the holidays. If limited or no participation in holiday mealtime events is on the menu this year, that is okay! Your mental health and happiness are the most important!